Beginning the Journey to Self-Belief
We doubt ourselves because we worry about what others may think.
When we are in doubt, it's often because we don't want to make any room for mistakes. However, mistakes are also how we learn and grow. We can lessen self-doubt and fear of failure by practicing being kind to ourselves, no matter the outcome.
When we are scared to stop the self-doubt, we internalize the stories others have told us, we hang out with people who doubt themselves too, we are doubting ourselves to a point where we feel comfortable being last and we become addicted to our own negativity and excuses.
So let’s talk about believing in yourself.
Believing in yourself means having faith in your own capabilities. It means believing that you can do something that it is within your ability. When you believe in yourself, you can overcome self-doubt and have the confidence to take action and get things done.
So, what exactly happens when you stop believing? What happens when you lose you? You become lost; you are no longer you. Low self-esteem creeps in due to or our self stories and self-history.
Steps to Confidently Believe in Yourself
Work on your strengths not your weaknesses — Everyone has weaknesses and strengths. You need to determine how to identify your strengths. The solution to start building confidence right away is to stop spinning your wheels at things you aren’t wired for. Discover what you are already good at, and work at becoming great. Talk to your family, close friends, and colleagues about what your strengths are. What are some things they come to you for help with? You’re not fishing for compliments, though sometimes this exercise can come with a confidence boost.
Embrace who you are — How can you have faith in yourself when you don’t know who you really are? Or worse, you are trying hard to be someone you’re not. Self-confidence comes from embracing who you are and what’s important to you. It does not come from being inauthentic or trying to impress people. Remember that your experience of life is about you, and their experience of life is about them.
Believe you can and you will — It’s not wishful thinking — believing something changes the way you see the world and yourself. You either see possibilities, or hopeless obstacles. Which will you choose? To start believing in yourself, you have to stop believing you are stuck with the skills and abilities you have right now. This is called a fixed mindset, which is a limited thinking pattern that’s fatal to your success.
Instead, start believing you can change. This way of thinking is called a growth mindset. It means that you believe change is possible. It may be true that you don’t have what it takes to accomplish your goals, right now. But if you believe you can improve, develop, and learn, then you will get there — even when nothing goes right. You will grow.
Be your own coach — If you don’t believe in yourself, you won’t believe someone who is cheering you on from the sidelines. That’s why a great small business coach leads their clients to success not by cheerleading, but by developing talent. Managers who focus on developing talent get outstanding results. The secret is, you don’t need another person to work through this process. You don’t need to possess qualities of leadership to coach yourself through it. Choosing ideas that suit you and working with your strengths.
Work on these steps consistently, and you will begin to see amazing things happening in your life.
There are challenges. Part of the process means getting over negative self-talk, fear of failure, and imposter syndrome. You may have to face genuine anxiety and work on ways to manage it. Every single person who has done any kind of self-improvement will tell you that these feelings are very real. They’ll tell you it’s scary, but the results are worth it. Each time you step into something new there will be fear. Your power lies in walking through that fear and doing the thing anyway.
It’s your life and you don’t need to live it to anyone’s expectations but your own. If you want a different life, make it yourself.
~ Jade Asuncion