What happens when you’re surrounded by the people who are unable to understand and empathize others, and who only focus on themselves? Narcissism is a self-centered personality style characterized as having an excessive interest in one's physical appearance and an excessive pre-occupation with one's own needs, often at the expense of others. They might think they’re entitled to go where they want, snoop through your personal things, or tell you how you should feel. Maybe they give you unsolicited advice and take credit for things you’ve done.

A narcissistic personality disorder causes problems in many areas of life, such as relationships, work, school or financial affairs. People with narcissistic personality disorder may be generally unhappy and disappointed when they're not given the special favors or admiration, they believe they deserve.

Is it possible to live happily with a narcissist? Can narcissists be good family member? How do you cope when you’re seeing them over the holidays?

Combining a narcissist with the already heightened drama and expectations of the holiday season, can feel like a recipe for disaster. The narcissist in your family tree might be a parent, an adult child, even an in-law. But whoever it is, getting together with them in celebration can mean putting up with their criticism, self-aggrandizement, and demand for attention.

If someone in your family possess this behavior, you're probably not super excited to be spending time with them over the holidays. Here are the tactics that can make get-togethers easier:

• Expect no sympathy or emotional support. If you open up about events like a job loss or health problems— you expect family members to express sympathy and support. A narcissist isn't capable of giving that to you. This can catch you off guard and leave you feeling hurt and discouraged. Remember that the narcissist does not see the world as you do. Look for comfort and support from others instead.

• Don't get defensive. When a narcissist monopolizes holiday dinner conversation or shows no interest in the other people, you may feel defensive. Their behavior is a way to compensate for how they really feel. Understanding this can help you feel empathy for them and not get so angry when they behave as they will.

• Set firm boundaries. Narcissists often feel they are being mistreated or that others are the source of problems and not them, and tend to adopt a manipulative, persuasive, and dominant attitude to get their way with family members or friends. If you can't get out of the holiday event, limit your time there. You have the choice to limit your presence and interaction with such individuals for your own sanity, whether they like it or not.

• Look after your mental health. It's holiday time, and just because there's a narcissist in the house doesn't mean you can't enjoy all the good things the season brings. It's important to take care of your own mental health, as people who are abused by narcissists often end up blaming themselves for the dysfunctional relationship and may develop symptoms of anxiety or depression. Be good to yourself, and before you know it, the gathering will be over, and you can plan not to have to see them again next year.

Knowledge is power. Becoming aware of the shortcomings of narcissistic people can leave you with a sense of freedom and power. Addressing your issues in therapy may allow you to free yourself from negative core beliefs that you may have developed as a result of the parenting that constantly made you feel inferior or inadequate and develop the sense of value and respect that we all deserve.

~ Jade Asuncion

When it comes to that time of year for back-to-school preparations, some children are excited and others are filled with nervousness and anxiety. Moms can also experience these emotions as their children transition into the next level of their schooling. Every family approaches the back-to-school preparations differently, but there are certain key activities that you can carry out to make the process one that is smooth and exciting. Here are five tips that can help you prepare your kids for heading back to school.

1. Re-establish a Routine: The summer break was a time of relaxing and not having a care about the rigors of school life. As it gets closer to the school term, it is essential to get back into the school routine rhythm. Start with gradually reverting to school bedtime, and waking up and having breakfast at the same time daily, like your kids would when school is in session. Children of all ages are more likely to handle the new schedule if they know what to expect.

2. Shop For School Supplies Together: Shopping together for school supplies is a great way to get your little ones excited about starting a new grade. Give them a little bit of freedom to choose certain items, like a backpack and lunchbox. Print a copy of your child’s school supply list and go shopping early so you can scour for the best deals that can save you money. Your kids can be your helpers, checking items off the supply list as they are found. This way shopping can be more efficient, interactive and fun overall.

3. Set-Up a New Homework Station: Good study habits are easier to build when kids have a dedicated and attractive spot to hit the books. Older children and teens especially thrive when having a study space to call their own. Choose a place that is quiet enough for your child to concentrate and avoid distractions like the television or play areas. Get them involved in selecting trays, storage boxes, and more to organize school supplies. Create an area to showcase their art, homework assignments, and keepsakes, such as on a ladder, bookshelf, or large cork-board for a personal touch.

4. Keep Things Positive: Not all children are excited about going back to school, and so, it is imperative that positivity is maintained throughout the process. A lack of excitement doesn’t mean that your kids hate everything about school. Focus on the things that they like, be it recess, meeting new students, music class, the opportunity to play sports or join a new club. Visit the school early to familiarize your child with the  spaces they will spend the majority of their time. If possible, find an opportunity to meet the teacher together and encourage your child to ask simple questions.

5. Prepare Emotions: Let your kid know why learning is important and how it can be fun, and allow him or her to share feelings of anxiety, never forgetting to acknowledge feelings, and offer simple ways to ease the anxiety. Ultimately it’s a wonderful thing that your child will be developing and learning, but it’s definitely a whole new grade and a new world.

While school preparations can be stressful, as a mother you can make the process much easier for yourself and your children. Start with re-establishing a routine, shop for school supplies, set up a new  homework station with your kids, stay positive and honor their feelings.

During the months of pregnancy, you want to feel your very best - for both you and baby. Staying active is paramount for maintaining this mental and physical well-being while you’re pregnant.  Exercising combines benefits like a brighter mood and higher energy levels with toned muscles and greater flexibility. Additionally, a regular prenatal exercise regimen may even reduce the likelihood of needing a C-section. Dr. Nita Landry, a Board-certified OB-GYN and co-host of “The Doctors” reports: “Having strong abs and a fit cardiovascular system might make labor and delivery easier.” So, which exercises are best for pregnant women seeking toned abdominal muscles and a healthy heart?  Let’s dive into the top 3 exercises for expectant moms.

Swimming: Low-impact workouts that don’t put additional pressure on your joints are ideal to perform during pregnancy. Swimming, specifically, has a therapeutic effect on the entire system, especially the heart. Rest periods may be spent floating on the water, a practice known to decrease anxiety, depression, and muscle discomfort.

Pilates: Possibly the best work-out for building a solid core, Pilates engages the muscles of your thighs, glutes, abs, and lower back. While you’re sculpting these key areas, you are also improving your posture, helping to boost your confidence as a new life grows inside you.

Weights: Strength training is one of the most effective forms of exercise and often yields the quickest results. During pregnancy, though, you may want to opt for some lighter weights (no more than 30 pounds total) and shorten your work-out sessions to a half hour or less. You’ll still reap the benefits of increased stamina and calorie burn.

Yoga and more: In addition to these work-outs, you may also engage in distance walking, prenatal yoga, or dancing to stay fit and feel good. Just make sure your work-outs are not too vigorous or leaving you drenched in sweat and out of breath. This rules out intense exercise like running or boxing for most women but leaves you with many other enjoyable and safe options. The American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists recommends 30 minutes of daily physical activity while pregnant – so lace up your sneakers and pick the work-out that feels right for you.

Having more than one kid in the household increases your chances of conflict. Sibling rivalry will become an inevitable aspect of the relationship with your kids. The conflict can leave parents at their wits end, exhausted, wanting to find a solution that can bring it to an end. Bickering, teasing, and even physical fights can be disruptive, create an unhappy home environment, and a sour relationship between siblings. Here are three ways that you can help your kids manage sibling conflicts.

1. Parent as You Should: Ignoring the conflict between your children is reckless and neglectful. You have a responsibility to take action when sibling rivalry progresses to excessive physical or verbal incidents. Step in and address the situation by having a candid conversation with your kids about what’s going on. Listen to their concerns and provide suggestions on how they can handle disagreements in a positive manner, without teasing, being spiteful or physical fights.

2. Implement a Family Plan: Establish real consequences, both positive and negative, by creating a family plan that directly addresses the sibling rivalry. The consequences should be levied against all involved in the conflict. For example, everyone loses computer privileges if a shouting match erupts. On the other hand, should the kids go an afternoon without any fighting, they could enjoy family game night as a privilege.

3. Avoid Comparisons: It is normal for siblings to have different personalities and abilities, but comparisons should be avoided at all cost. You don’t want to give your kids the impression that you love one more than the other, or acknowledge the accomplishments of one and ignore the other. Acknowledge your kids worth on an equal level, highlighting and encouraging their talents on an individual basis. 

Sibling conflict should be avoided because it can be toxic. Parents have a responsibility to limit or eliminate sibling rivalry from their household. It is important to promote a warm and close-knit relationship between your kids because it is important to how your kids will transition into their adult relationships. While sibling rivalry is generally inevitable, it can be addressed in every home if parents play their part, establish ways to deal with the conflict and avoid pitting siblings against each other.

~Monica Manuel, MS, LPC