Posts in General Therapy
Control What You Control
 
 

In the fast-paced and ever-changing world we live in, it is easy to feel overwhelmed by circumstances beyond our control. However, amidst the chaos, lies an empowering truth: there are aspects of our lives that we can control. Being mindful of these controllable factors is of utmost importance, as it grants us the ability to shape our own destinies and foster personal growth and well-being. Embracing a holistic view, we delve into the essential elements within our grasp, such as our beliefs, attitudes, thoughts, and choices, that hold the potential to transform our lives for the better. By recognizing and harnessing this power, we can steer ourselves towards a more purposeful and fulfilling existence. In this journey of self-discovery, we find the key to unlocking our true potential and embracing a life lived on our own terms.

Understanding Our Being: We begin with self-awareness, getting to know ourselves better, identifying strengths, and areas for improvement. By developing a growth mindset, we embrace a continuous journey of self-improvement.

  1. Expanding Knowledge and Empathy: Reading plays a vital role in personal development. By diversifying our reading materials, we gain a broader perspective and use books as powerful tools for empathy and personal growth.

  2. Nurturing Physical and Mental Well-being: Recognizing the mind-body connection, we emphasize the benefits of regular exercise. By incorporating physical activity into our daily routines and exploring various forms of exercise, we improve mental and emotional well-being.

  3. The Amount of Effort You Put Forth: In the pursuit of personal development, the effort we invest holds profound significance. Recognizing the importance of consistent and dedicated effort, we embark on a transformative journey. By setting achievable goals and diligently tracking our progress, we pave the way for meaningful growth.

Our ability to focus on what we can control is a powerful tool for personal growth and well-being. Through this holistic exploration, we have learned that there are numerous aspects of our lives that lie within our grasp to shape and improve. By understanding our being through self-awareness and embracing a growth mindset, we lay the foundation for continuous self-improvement. In this journey of self-discovery and growth, we discover how these controllable factors influence our lives positively and pave the way for a more fulfilling and purpose-driven existence. By taking charge of what we can control, we create a life that aligns with our values and aspirations.

New Year’s Resolution for Health & Fitness
 
 

As the year begins, you may be considering a New Year’s resolution. Maybe you made a resolution last year and stuck with it, or maybe you had totally forgotten about it by February. Maybe you don’t believe in making New Year’s resolutions.

Regardless, it may help if you have a better idea of what exactly a New Year’s resolution is and what you’d like it be, too. A New Year’s resolution is a promise that you make to yourself or others to carry out an idea or action.

Health and fitness resolutions are some of the hardest to keep. However, these resolutions can be crucial to improving both your physical and mental health. Don’t make the mistake that many often do — make big, unattainable goals and end up disappointed. Start out with small and doable fitness goal, then build from there.

  1. Go for a walk after dinner. Tip: If you don’t have a dog who’s expecting a walk, bring a family member with you or just some headphones to pass the time. You can start with short distances at first.

  2. Get familiar with a new machine. Tip: Ease into a new machine at the gym. Be sure to start slow and don’t overexert yourself.

  3. Move every day. Tip: Some days you may move less than others, and that’s OK. Listen to your body, but try to loosen up to prevent stiffness and injury.

  4. Address problem areas before they get worse. Tip: Buy yourself a small ice pack that you can put on areas you’ve previously injured or that frequently get sore. Use it nightly or in the morning after you stretch.

  5. Drink an extra glass of water each day. Tip: Pick a time of day that makes sense for you, such as first thing in the morning. Consider swapping out a sugary or caffeinated beverage for water.

  6. Learn how to prepare a vegetable dish you love. Tip: Choose an easy recipe if you’re new to cooking. It doesn’t have to require the oven, either. You can easily create unique salsas or salads.

2021 has been a challenging year for all of us, but we can’t let that stop you from living our best life!

~ Jade Asuncion

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Fitness Routine: The Mental Health Benefits of Exercise
 
 

You already know that exercise is good for your body. But did you know it can also boost your mood, improve your sleep, and help you deal with depression, anxiety, stress, and more?

Exercise can improve brain function and protect memory and thinking skills. To begin with, it increases your heart rate, which promotes the flow of blood and oxygen to your brain. It can also stimulate the production of hormones that enhance the growth of brain cells.

Exercise is not just about aerobic capacity and muscle size. Sure, exercise can improve your physical health and your physique, trim your waistline, improve your sex life, and even add years to your life. But that’s not what motivates most people to stay active.

People who exercise regularly tend to do so because it gives them an enormous sense of well-being. They feel more energetic throughout the day, sleep better at night, have sharper memories, and feel more relaxed and positive about themselves and their lives. And it’s also a powerful medicine for many common mental health challenges.

Regular exercise can have a profoundly positive impact on depression, anxiety, and ADHD. It also relieves stress, improves memory, helps you sleep better, and boosts your overall mood. And you don’t have to be a fitness fanatic to reap the benefits. Research indicates that modest amounts of exercise can make a real difference. No matter your age or fitness level, you can learn to use exercise as a powerful tool to deal with mental health problems, improve your energy and outlook, and get more out of life.

What are some ways to started with exercise?

Many of us find it hard enough to motivate ourselves to exercise at the best of times. But when you feel depressed, anxious, stressed or have another mental health problem, it can seem doubly difficult. You know exercise will make you feel better, but depression has robbed you of the energy and motivation you need to work out, or your social anxiety means you can’t bear the thought of being seen at an exercise class or running through the park.

  1. Start small. When you’re under the cloud of anxiety or depression and haven’t exercised for a long time, setting extravagant goals like completing a marathon or working out for an hour every morning will only leave you more despondent if you fall short. Better to set achievable goals and build up from there.

  2. Schedule workouts when your energy is highest. Perhaps you have most energy first thing in the morning before work or school or at lunchtime before the mid-afternoon lull hits? Or maybe you do better exercise for longer at the weekends. If depression or anxiety, has you feeling tired and unmotivated all day long, try dancing to some music or simply going for a walk. Even a short, 15-minute walk can help clear your mind, improve your mood, and boost your energy level. As you move and start to feel a little better, you’ll often boost your energy enough to exercise more vigorously—by walking further, breaking into a run, or adding a bike ride, for example.

  3. Focus on activities you enjoy. Any activity that gets you moving counts. That could include throwing a Frisbee with a dog or friend, walking laps of a mall window shopping, or cycling to the grocery store. If you’ve never exercised before or don’t know what you might enjoy, try a few different things. Activities such as gardening or tackling a home improvement project can be great ways to start moving more when you have a mood disorder—as well as helping you become more active, they can also leave you with a sense of purpose and accomplishment.

  4. Be comfortable. Wear clothing that’s comfortable and choose a setting that you find calming or energizing. That may be a quiet corner of your home, a scenic path, or your favorite city park.

  5. Make exercise a social activity. Exercising with a friend or loved one, or even your kids, will not only make exercising more fun and enjoyable, it can also help motivate you to stick to a workout routine. You’ll also feel better than if you were exercising alone. In fact, when you’re suffering from a mood disorder such as depression, the companionship can be just as important as the exercise.

You don’t have to spend hours in a gym or force yourself into long, monotonous workouts to experience the many benefits of exercise. These tips can help you find activities you enjoy and start to feel better, look better, and get more out of life.

~ Jade Asuncion

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Cultivating Self Compassion
 
 

Let’s face it, we all struggle with negative self-talk. Some more than others, but we all hear that little voice in the back of our minds that either berates us, expresses deep disappointment or frustration with our actions, and flags down our every insecurity when we least expect it. We hold those so-called “truths” as fact and not for what they are: thoughts. Fleeting thoughts plague our minds now and again, but it’s essential to realize that the power remains within ourselves.

The key to combating this phenomenon is self-compassion and not giving said thoughts any more intensity or tenacity in our already stressful lives.

Upon the first actualization of what self-compassion is, we may ask ourselves, “Well, what is it?” or, “What does that even mean?” and this question is more common than I realized. Most have experienced compassion at least once in their lives, either from a parent, friend, teacher, or mentor. Those moments are a lot more precious than when we first acquaint ourselves with them. This saving grace is transformative, and practicing this method towards ourselves would amount to unprecedented changes within our lives.

Self-compassion factors in three components: self-kindness, mindfulness and common humanity -- all three of which we practice daily. The warm inner understanding, acceptance of imperfection, and balanced approach to our humanness that accompanies self-compassion is the focal point of it all. Taking a nurturing perspective, rather than critical, makes all the difference in our mental wellbeing and can improve our outlook on life and our actions.

It’s dually essential to understand what self-compassion is not, and how the initial realization is daunting and discouraging in this mindfulness journey. Dr. Kristen Neff describes this phenomenon as akin to ‘backdraft,’ “A similar process can occur when we open the door of our hearts – love goes in, and old pain comes out….When we give ourselves unconditional love, we discover the conditions under which we were unloved’ or ‘Love reveals everything unlike itself.” (Self Compassion, Neff).

While confidence and wishful thinking are ideal and the easy way out, it cheapens the true meaning of what self-compassion is. Holding ourselves accountable for our mistakes and flaws helps us elevate and rewire our thinking to bolster long-lasting pleasure in our lives.

~Eryka Warren

A New Journey: 5 Steps to Finding The Right Therapist for You
 
 

The portrayal of contemporary therapy practices often pushes many individuals away from pursuing, or even entertaining, the thought of therapy as a whole. This can be due to many factors, including poor experiences in the past, stigmas that frequently surround treatment, and fear! Despite the reason for feeling any apprehension in seeking out counseling, the bravery and acknowledgment of your needs is not only the first step but should be commended more often. For that reason, giving yourself grace through this new journey is essential.

Whether this is your first time seeking out therapy or you're just looking for a new counselor, this process can be fairly simple with the proper steps as follows:

  1. Consultation and Payment. It’s key to have an idea of how you’re going to pay for a sessions prior to attending one. Individuals considering private pay are also entitled to several benefits that insurance does not offer, such as, reimbursement, flexibility of payments, as well nondisclosure of a diagnosis to an insurance provider.

    If you're planning to pay through insurance, it's crucial to be aware of what your insurance will and will not cover for you. Verify your out-of-pocket and co-pay amounts with your insurance company to make sure you are covered. Joie de Vivre Counseling and Therapy accepts Aetna, Anthem BCBS, UHC, Cigna, and UHC Student Resources. We also accept all PPO insurance plans as out-of-network providers. 

  2. Explore your Resources. Therapy takes form in many mediums. It recognizes people from all occupations and backgrounds, so it's vital to research all of your options. For example, students are usually eligible for discounted therapy through their university. Many therapists are also willing to meet a client halfway through the offering of sliding scales fees, which is dependent on an individual’s monthly income. Joie de Vivre Counseling and Therapy offers a sliding scale to students.

  3. Finding the Right Match. To make sure you're seeking out the proper care, be sure to research the right therapist that meets your exact needs. Some counselors may specialize in only a particular form of care or may only see a specific type of client based on their age, gender, relationship status, etc. Here are a few links that might help you on your search:

    • Psychology Today Psychology Today is a media organization with a focus on psychology and human behavior. The Psychology Today website features therapy and health professionals directories and hundreds of mental health blogs.

    • Therapy for Black Girls Therapy for Black Girls is an online space dedicated to encouraging the mental wellness of Black women and girls.

    • Therapy Den A progressive and all-inclusive therapist directory working with allies and partners to make meaningful change within the mental health industry and society as a whole.

    • Therapy Tribe The purpose is to help people find great mental health resources like therapists, support groups, wellness tools as well as an overall sense of community.

  4. Transparency. Sometimes, we may find ourselves being unhappy with the provider we're with, and that's okay. As an individual, you're human, and at some point we are all going find ourselves in situations that may not be ideal. However, it is essential to be very honest with yourself and your therapist to transition over to someone who better suits your needs. At the end of the day, your mental health comes first, and finding the best care is the top priority.

  5. Virtual Therapy. Do you have a busy schedule? Are you not comfortable seeing your therapist in person? That's alright! Virtual platforms and apps are dedicated solely to issues like these that arise. Despite your agenda for the day or what others may say about online therapy, it's just as valid and effective as in-person therapy. Here are a few places that might aid you in your search:

    • Joie de Vivre Counseling and Therapy offers flexible Telehealth appointments to aid in your mental health concerns and assist you on your journey towards a more fulfilling life. Whatever your goals might be, our therapists are here to be of support every step of the way.

    • Psychology Today is another resource to find the right fit for your mental health needs. Psychology Today provide a plethora of providers that willing to adhere to said guidelines and your schedule.

Whether you're coping with trauma, relationship troubles, grief, or just everyday struggles, wanting assistance and treatment for said concerns is more than valid and the best course of action. Joie de Vivre Counseling and Therapy is ready when you are. Determine how your goals align with your therapist's choice to decide the best course of action. Soon, you'll be well on your way towards better mental health.

~Eryka Warren

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Introduction to Animal-Assisted Psychotherapy
 
 

I grew up in the Philippines and would describe my childhood as a humble, simple and happy. I was eleven years old when my mother passed which cast a dim cloud over my colorful future. After that, my father had to work far away from our home and would send my siblings and I money. Since then, I learned to become independent and to decide for my own, no guidance from a caregiver or guardian. When I turned seventeen I decided to move to a different location to find a job, and by God’s grace, hard work and perseverance, I was able to support myself and help my family. Soon I was able to take care of myself, but this was not the life I dreamed about. I was lonely and just working on a daily basis to survive.

I took advantage of pandemic to help my siblings and decided to bring my family especially my nieces & nephews under my wing. I know I was happy but kept asking myself if I made the right decision of transitioning from a single transwoman life to motherhood. I secretly struggled a lot mentally and physically for a very long time. I had an occasional headaches, unfocused-mind and disturbed sleep.

I was battling in a “separation anxiety disorder” a mental health problem. A therapist helped and advised me to take good care of my pets; Chin (Husky), Gucci (Black Cat), and Akira (Leopard Cat). I had to wake up to feed, bath and play with them everyday. Unconsciously, they provided me a sense of responsibility and gave me reasons to enjoy life again.

  • Would animal-assisted therapy be helpful as a part of anxiety and depression management in my case?

  • Would such treatment be a helpful approach?

Pet therapy is a broad term that includes animal-assisted therapy and other animal-assisted activities. Animal-assisted therapy is a growing field that uses dogs or other animals to help people recover from or better cope with health problems, such as heart disease, cancer and mental health disorders. The purpose of pet therapy is to help someone recover from or cope with a health problem or mental disorder. Dogs and cats are most commonly used in pet therapy. However, fish, guinea pigs, horses, and other animals that meet screening criteria can also be used.

Studies around pets and mental health show that petting and playing with animals reduces stress-related hormones. And these benefits can occur after just five minutes of interacting with a pet. Therefore, pets are very helpful for anxiety sufferers. Playing with a dog or cat raises our levels of serotonin and dopamine.

The animal's handler has to go through a training course, plus the animal itself must pass a health screening among other criteria. - must be reliably house-trained.

In general, the interaction with a pet decreases distress and improves mood. The effects of the pet therapy are measurable, as seen by an increase in the release of endorphins in the person interacting with the animal. Endorphins are brain chemicals that are released and make you feel good.

Animal-Assisted Therapy can help those experiencing:

  • Anxiety & Depression

  • Asperger's Syndrome.

  • Autism Spectrum Disorder.

  • Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder.

  • Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder

Benefits:

  • Increased trust.

  • Reduced anxiety.

  • Less feeling of depression and isolation.

  • Increased self-esteem, self-acceptance, and social skills.

  • Better impulse control.

  • Increased problem-solving skills.

  • Improved communication skills, including non-verbal.

These programs have been implemented worldwide. A therapist can work with you to get the most out of your work with a pet and can assist you in using techniques that will help you.

— By Jade Asuncion

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Appreciating Your Current Season in Life

It is easy to get caught up in the whirlwind of lives around us. There are the friends that are getting married, the siblings having babies, and the social media lives seemingly filled to the brim with happiness, money, and blessings. Sometimes you sit back and wonder why those components are absent in your life, and other days you have fear while completely doubting the future. The more you compare where you’re at in life to where others are, the more you become increasingly unsatisfied with what you already have. When you appreciate each unique stage of life, there is an abundance of joy and fullness to be found.

Seasons of unknown are intended to force you to reprogram the desires of your heart. Sometimes what you want most in the world blinds you from what you need the most, and when you become fixated on comparisons with those around you, you no longer see the blessings in your peripheral.

Upon reflection, even the darkest times in your life possess an underlying message or source of growth. When your heart broke, you learned how to love yourself greatly and independently. When fired unexpectedly, you learned how to handle rejection and prove your talents. When you came out to your family and they disowned you, you found people to uplift and love you. Our most pivotal life changes sneak up on us when we are least trying to find them. 

Our perception of others reflects how we view ourselves. The people you have the hardest time removing from your consciousness are often the ones who possess the things you most subconsciously desire. However, it is simple to let your mind wander and attribute qualities to situations that are not true. Another woman who appears to be the perfect relationship is not prettier, smarter, or more deserving of love than you. Our mind becomes an inhospitable environment when our first reaction to others is of judgment and jealousy. Make your head space hospitable.

Consider an actual hospital. When a doctor treats his patient with kindness and consideration the patient heals quickly and no longer requires a bed. If the doctor fails to treat his patient the source of the problem cannot be found and the patient remain until she is healed. This is how our minds work. When we let people take a bed in our head space and we forget to place ourselves first and we drain our own resources. When we make our head space hospitable, the person in your mind will stay only awhile, then quickly exit.

Life is never stationary and neither should you allow your thoughts to be. When you change the processes of your mind, when you choose first joy, the rest will fall into place.

~Morgan O’Neal

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Being patient with ourselves

A lot of times we find ourselves being impatient and harsh towards ourselves. The constant pressure to be perfect and live a life that follows specific steps towards a dream or what we imagine as success, has caused a rushing, and impatient mentality. We may sometimes forget that there is no right or wrong way to live our lives. Society has significantly shaped the idea of a “perfect life” which has caused us to be impatient with ourselves. This is a reminder that there is no strict time line or handbook to life. Everyone’s timing is crafted to the unique individual. We have to practice being nicer to ourselves and recognizing the progress and success we already have achieved before dwelling on what the future holds. We can practice this by being mindful and loving ourselves in every aspect and step of life. This is one of the greatest gifts we can give to ourselves, patience.

Growing Through What You Go Through
Like a lotus flower, we have the ability to rise from the mud, bloom out of the darkness, and radiate into the world . . .

Sometimes we find ourselves hanging on to our mistakes, failures, setbacks, unwanted shifts, criticisms, dead cycles, and situations that we may feel weren't helping us evolve. Although these unpleasant moments have been placed in our path, it's relieving to know that these moments are not permanent and that they're not in control of our journey. These challenges have presented us with an opportunity to reflect on our decisions and grow from our experiences.

Accept wherever you are right now. Regardless of what happened to you last week or three years ago, this moment is your current state. You were brought here to this exact moment with more knowledge than before, a greater opportunity to grow, a victory to claim, and a testimony to inspire. Don't let who or what you were talk you out of who you're becoming. You are only responsible for now, so from this moment on, chose to be the very best version of you.

Recognizing your potential for greatness and accepting yourself is fundamental towards your growth. We can practice this whenever we feel overwhelmed, stressed, or when we want to return to the present moment.

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